6 posts tagged “san diego”

sleep is one of those past times that, if collectible, i would be at the swap meet every day with tons of knick-knacks to sell.  that being said, it tends to be a light sleep and probably an hour or so before i finally relinquish the subconscious to the conscious and therefore the darkness to the illumination of opening my eyelids, i hear almost everything.  that isn't to say that i necessarily identify the slams, clamors and bangs with exactitude and precision.

 

for example, as i was in the early dozings of the marine-layered morning that is so typical of san diego with its coolness that exudes a tranquility but is simply a ruse for the summer that is beset upon us, i kept hearing a repetitive sound (was it outside? inside?) of something strikingly similar to one sopping up a large puddle of water with a not-so-dry towel in the bathroom.  this could be a possibility at the place that i'm lodging at for the time being until shannon returns.  there are cats, dogs and people galore with baths and water typically utilized extensively.  perhaps one of the cats needed a flea bath and given the feline's natural abhorrence to water produced quite the mess for one of my roommates to then mop.

as i was ruminating half-awake on this possibility, the noise shifted direction and no longer did it seem to be coming from indoors.  it was a constant click, more refined now and discernible.  the night slumber was quickly fading, i knew it, but still i rustled with the sheets in an almost pretend sleep.  i had it: someone was pruning a bush or chopping a hedge.  snip. snip. snip.  with the clear slicing din of the shears immediately brought back memories of when i was still a pre-teen and was forced to mow the lawn every week. how i despised the notion of being out there.  getting sweaty and ruining my clothes.  the smell of the fumes from the lawn mower made me nauseous and well, i just didn't want to do it because my step-father told me that i had no choice.

 

along with the years going by and the color of the front door constantly being repainted (as my mother loved to change colors more often than a chameleon would), i began to get used to doing the lawn.  in fact, by the time that i left the house for greater evangelistic ops in brooklyn at 19, i was looking forward to getting out in the slightly overgrown blades of grass and even though we had a riding mower for the half-acre, i insisted on mowing everything with the pusher.  the straight lines and precision did something for me.  like a golf course.  the trimming of hedges and maintenance of the grounds was something pleasurable now.  perhaps the psychosis was setting in and the obsessive-compulsive behavior was unavoidable especially in a household where everything had to at least look perfect.

it made me think as i opened my eyes that i would like to have some type of garden or yard to take care of.  will it be possible to have such a thing in london? or is that still only available to aristocracy or simply be knighted - which doesn't appear to have the equality to the prior any longer.

the sounds are gone now and all i hear are the endless pecks of the keyboard and the nagging voice inside telling me to get up...i have flowers to pick for the wedding to be with renee in a couple of hours.

 

i normally wouldn't do this kind of thing - as the song goes.  but, i've not really done a gay pride properly, whatever that means...and from the party binge that took place...not sure when it will occur again.  but in the end, there were some laughs and hopefully some worthwhile photos taken.

i hadn't heard from him in almost 24 hours by the time that i finally called him.  i had received an email earlier stating that he was on his last train ride to bologna to present his thesis to the committee and hopefully finish his degree once and for all.  like me, it had been a rather grueling and lengthy expansion of time to the finish.  but the turtle does win the race.

when i finally did get him on the phone he was engulfed in a cacophony of sounds, glasses clinking and voices competing for an ever higher pitched laughter. 

"i'm done," he said.  "i finished first in my class and now i'm here with my parents, aunt and sister getting drunk."

fair enough.  well deserved and i wanted to be there in order to celebrate the night away with him.  here are the pictures i took as he was reveling in his success.  god, i love that man.

i woke up very early yesterday because the initial thought was that i would be the first one on, first one off at work.  that is how it usually happens at our job and thoughts of heading back into a tide pool of soft, down comforters for an early afternoon nap were already sufficiently propelling me to crawl out of the above-mentioned sack of feathers and whiteness. 

of course, the proposed plan of events only occurs under slower restaurant conditions.  yesterday being the first official day of the legalization of gay marriage in california made it a day that not only kept me busy all day long but wakened any tiredness i felt with a reassured sense of hope and positivity in this sometimes less-than-optimistic gay rights issue that of late has been in the forefront of my priorities and waking moments.

it started with a couple of women who sat quietly in my section, full of grins and laughter.  with two roses and lots of paperwork, they volunteered their plans for the day: to the tailor to pick up the dresses and then to the courthouse for the ceremony and license.  they have been together for 16 years, have four children and are now adding diamonds to their ring collection.

after speaking with them for a few moments, i turned towards the door to find two large parties with particular men clad head-to-toe with typical wedding fare: the matching suits and ties, lapels budding roses.  my initial thought was that these guys were simply the groomsmen for an even larger wedding celebration.  but having just talked to the two women in my section, i knew that this entourage of vow-takers was not going to end any time soon.

after work concluded for the day, i had plans to go to jennifer's house to watch game six.  amidst endless shots made by the celtics to the demise of their opponents, we began to brew the initial lists and plans for the shotgun wedding that i will call my own, this august 11, 2008.  i wrote down guest lists and flower ideas, from cakes to cars.  all of this within a relative budget.  both boBo and i want to have a simple affair with a very intimate crowd of close friends and family.  but that being said, things must be organized and since he is still tirelessly finishing his thesis, i have volunteered (?) for the position.  with the help of my newly appointed wedding coordinator: jennifer mitchell.

first thing's first: the venue.  we both want it on the beach.  which one, however, remains to be debated and decided by us.  friday is our first option and jennifer, louis and i are heading out to the locations where boBo and i have briefly discussed via phone and email conversations.

received a phone call from jen today.  after calling parks and recreation, apparently there are only four locations in san diego that permit beach weddings.  well, at least that liberates us somewhat from yet another large decision.  the guest list is hard enough.

 

it has been a week and a day since i landed in these united states and to be cliche, i have hit the ground running.  apart from one day reprieve spent immediately sunning it up at ocean beach with tak and niamh, i have been working everyday (willingly) at the hash house.

it is set into motion now, these plans of ours that we have been discussing for months and months on end, and to begin to realize them is almost surreal.  

 

boBo has already moved out of our place and is finishing up his position with his job.  soon he'll be working non-stop to finish his degree.

 

and i have found myself back into a somewhat familiar setting and at the same time oddly different.  buildings removed and taller, quasi-shiek replacements take up the same soil and cloud up the sky.  people that i have known have either passed through or passed away.  fashionable eateries of last season have been replaced with the latest trend in what is thought to be at the centre of everyone's palate.

 

i'm the first one to understand that nothing remains the same.  that is apparent with every movement i take forward on the perfectly aligned and evenly paved walkways that i am trekking on.  but i refuse to look at this as anything but positive, even when there are tears and a deep sense of loss felt in my gut with this awareness.

 

all of this is worth the end result.  and in the meantime, trying to enjoy every moment.  it's the biggest challenge yet conversely the easiest thing to do.  still ironing out the wrinkles on this part of the game.  more on that later.

 

after a lot of talk and contemplation, boBo and i have decided to get married.  or form a civil union, depending on where you happen to find yourself.  we began to deliberate on the idea over a year ago but it was not until budapest when we began to give it serious contemplation.  the deal is this: i cannot continue to be in the situation i am in right now: not exactly legal.  i have been for some parts, but for others: no.  many hopes have been placed on the chance to obtain a work visa of some sort...but to no successful avail.  but then again, i don't want to leave boBo.

boBo, on the other hand, would be the same as me if we were to go back to the united states on some relatively permanent situation.  and since neither country widely accepts gay unions then we have decided to seek other measures in order to be together without looking behind our backs or under the tables, so to speak.

 

all this to say that soon - although the dates are uncertain at this time - we are going to make an attempt at moving to london and form a civil union together.

with that in mind, i am heading back to san diego for a spell, probably for the summer in order to get my head around this new development.  we are wanting to take it very seriously and there is much thought and preparation that will go into it.

 

it's strange.  the thought of leaving italy.  it's like i just arrived.  which i did in some respects.  but it will always be here.  but so will everything else.