4 posts tagged “marriage”

i normally wouldn't do this kind of thing - as the song goes.  but, i've not really done a gay pride properly, whatever that means...and from the party binge that took place...not sure when it will occur again.  but in the end, there were some laughs and hopefully some worthwhile photos taken.

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i woke up very early yesterday because the initial thought was that i would be the first one on, first one off at work.  that is how it usually happens at our job and thoughts of heading back into a tide pool of soft, down comforters for an early afternoon nap were already sufficiently propelling me to crawl out of the above-mentioned sack of feathers and whiteness. 

of course, the proposed plan of events only occurs under slower restaurant conditions.  yesterday being the first official day of the legalization of gay marriage in california made it a day that not only kept me busy all day long but wakened any tiredness i felt with a reassured sense of hope and positivity in this sometimes less-than-optimistic gay rights issue that of late has been in the forefront of my priorities and waking moments.

it started with a couple of women who sat quietly in my section, full of grins and laughter.  with two roses and lots of paperwork, they volunteered their plans for the day: to the tailor to pick up the dresses and then to the courthouse for the ceremony and license.  they have been together for 16 years, have four children and are now adding diamonds to their ring collection.

after speaking with them for a few moments, i turned towards the door to find two large parties with particular men clad head-to-toe with typical wedding fare: the matching suits and ties, lapels budding roses.  my initial thought was that these guys were simply the groomsmen for an even larger wedding celebration.  but having just talked to the two women in my section, i knew that this entourage of vow-takers was not going to end any time soon.

after work concluded for the day, i had plans to go to jennifer's house to watch game six.  amidst endless shots made by the celtics to the demise of their opponents, we began to brew the initial lists and plans for the shotgun wedding that i will call my own, this august 11, 2008.  i wrote down guest lists and flower ideas, from cakes to cars.  all of this within a relative budget.  both boBo and i want to have a simple affair with a very intimate crowd of close friends and family.  but that being said, things must be organized and since he is still tirelessly finishing his thesis, i have volunteered (?) for the position.  with the help of my newly appointed wedding coordinator: jennifer mitchell.

first thing's first: the venue.  we both want it on the beach.  which one, however, remains to be debated and decided by us.  friday is our first option and jennifer, louis and i are heading out to the locations where boBo and i have briefly discussed via phone and email conversations.

received a phone call from jen today.  after calling parks and recreation, apparently there are only four locations in san diego that permit beach weddings.  well, at least that liberates us somewhat from yet another large decision.  the guest list is hard enough.

after a lot of talk and contemplation, boBo and i have decided to get married.  or form a civil union, depending on where you happen to find yourself.  we began to deliberate on the idea over a year ago but it was not until budapest when we began to give it serious contemplation.  the deal is this: i cannot continue to be in the situation i am in right now: not exactly legal.  i have been for some parts, but for others: no.  many hopes have been placed on the chance to obtain a work visa of some sort...but to no successful avail.  but then again, i don't want to leave boBo.

boBo, on the other hand, would be the same as me if we were to go back to the united states on some relatively permanent situation.  and since neither country widely accepts gay unions then we have decided to seek other measures in order to be together without looking behind our backs or under the tables, so to speak.

all this to say that soon - although the dates are uncertain at this time - we are going to make an attempt at moving to london and form a civil union together.

it's strange.  the thought of leaving italy.  it's like i just arrived.  which i did in some respects.  but it will always be here.  but so will everything else.